Bad New Sailor Soldier Names

[The Doctor]

Very bad ideas for Sailor Soldiers, each with a very good reason for being such a poor candidate. Kudos to "Sailor Food".

First there are:

Sailor Attila - Kept barking orders at everybody and threatening to chop off heads if his demands weren't met.

Sailor Swiss Army Knife - the all-purpose Sailor Scout to eat, clean, and fight crime with. Too flexible, and eventually became the hero we know know as HeroGuy (Sesame Street).

Sailor Duct Tape - Very useful, but kept sticking in Jupiter's hair. Some say D.T. was rather "attached" to Jupiter.

[princessglaive]

Sailor King-Kong - "I stand for justice, i stand for love, the not so graceful sailor senshi... oh, well you know the story... gimme banana"

[thereisnospoon]

Sailor MacGyver- Uses everyday items to stop youma, but refuses to kill them. She also has a mullet.

[ladylilith]

Sailor Horatio Caine ( with Sailor Grissom): very scientific senshi. They find the monsters using almost everything in the crime scene. Once, they were able to find Zirconia using only a hair of her(....wait a second...)

[The Doctor]

Sailor Shakespeare: Would absolutely bore the enemy to tears (or at least into a nap) by reading one of his plays or sonnets in front of them. Problem was, he also made the other senshi fall asleep, and he had no attacks other than "Manuscript Mind Manipulation".

[thereisnospoon]

Whoa! Huge slam on Shakespeare out of nowhere!

[The Queen]

sailor Shakespeare that was fun , but i think amy may find her company great.

[The Doctor]

Sailor Shakespeare is a guy, mind.

Anyway...

Sailor Achilles: If one of the others should try to steal her boyfriend, she'd refuse to fight. And she had a limp because someone shot her in the heel.

[Sailor Io]

Guys can't be Scouts. Lol.

And you think they could have just double-dipped Achilles...

[Satty]

Incorrect. Guys cannot be Senshi.

Sailor Stapler: She's a stapler... Um, speaks for itself? ;

[The Doctor]

You're both entirely right, Io and Satty (though senshi is the preferred term).

So, a Sailor Shakespeare would be like another Tuxedo Kamen, maybe?

Sailor Ajax: she was very strong, a cousin to Minako (a.k.a. Sailor Venus) who fought with her in Britannia, but almost killed Ami in a fight over a copy of the Encyclopedia Britannia, and ended up killing an innocent store clerk. She excised herself from the group and later stabbed herself in the heart outside of her house.

Her death was the signal to the gods (and Neo-Queen Serenity) to send Chibi-Usa to the 20th Century.

[Katze]

Hum.

Sailor Pirate - She has hooks instead of gloves, wears a hat instead of a tiara and uses a sabre for fighting. A parrot sits on her left shoulder. Her attacks include

"YAARRR, booty!"

"Polly wants a cookie, crow!"

"Board the Spanish galeon!"

[Sailor Io]

LOL
yarr, booty... too good.

[The Queen]

that was fun katze

[The Doctor]

Sailor MAD: His alias is Alfred E Neuman. When he henshins and turns into Sailor MAD, she wears atrociously skimpy version of the conventional unfiorm (you can just barely see her knickers).

She attacks using:

+ "Spy Summon Competition" which summons two guys in trenchcoats (one white coat, one black coat), and they try to hurt each other and the enemies simultaneously.

+ "What Me, Worry Beam" which causes any people within a 12 mile radius to collapse from apathy and go to sleep for 12 hours.

+ " Plague of 10" in which the enemy is attacked by 10 clones of some celebrities who have done something embarassing, horrifying, or just outright sinful in the past year.

The reason she was cut off is because of the outfit, and because her attacks were beyond the phase of ridiculous. She also encouraged Rei-chan to steal Mamoru-san from Usagi (even though he knew perfectly well that Usagi and Mamoru were dating). Once Usagi found out about this, she attacked Alfred with a knife and gave him an overkilled circumcision.

He now works as safety director at one of the coal power plants that powers Tokyo.